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Sad to say that Swinging often ends up this way, one party or another seems to always get their feelings hurt.
But you asked, " why would she keep fucking him if he wasn't that great? " .... as a woman I'm going to guess she continued to `fuck` him cause of her low self esteem combined with a semi submissive personality (I say this because most women are not talked into swinging to begin with and I assume she went into this in some part to please you). IMHO she has/had and will continue to have problems saying NO to someone, in short she is driven by pleasing.
You want to talk to someone who has been in similar shoes? Again I'm sad to say that many of us have experienced some sort of pain over sexual issues with a significant other. The number 1 fantasy of most men is 2 women, you just took a slightly different route.
If you want to find a good nites sleep again I'd suggest counseling with a kink friendly counselor.
You said ................
Im a . I raised them both. We had three kids of our own. We were a happy couple so I thought. She is a little over weight so she had a little self esteem problem. So I instigated doing 3 ways with other men to boost her self esteem. We did that together a few times. Which was arousing for me and her. Swingig in my definition is open and honest. She found a black lover at her work and fucked on him for 8 months a totall secret from me. She says he wasnt that great. But why would she keep fucking him if he wasn't. FOR 8 MONTHS. She would him and text him daily. So now I have sex with her from time to time all I see is her and him together when we do it and it always turns out to be a night mare for me. I have not slept for more than 3 housrs per night since. I would like beautiful adult wants sex encounters Rock Springs to find a woman that has simialar events and who has more in common with me in mind. I have 2 horses love to ride. I like peace of mind and mountains of beautty.
Just curious...